Weylyn’s ChangeLog

For my class I had to pick an ethnic or other sub-group in the community for which to identify information needs. Instead of selecting the suggested Spanish-speaking community, or the ever-popular elderly community, I picked the LGBT—Lesbian, Gay, Bi-sexual, Transgender community. It has certainly been a learning process, and in doing my research I have run across a few things that have brought my attention to my own perceptions, and how they may differ from, well, from others.

In doing my project, I had the pleasure of conducting four interviews with people considered community leaders for the LGBT community.(1) One of my interviewees mentioned comfort levels, and how do people deal when they see two people of the same gender holding hands, for instance(2). I have unabashedly held hands with my sister(3) and my female friends. I only now wonder if people thought I was in a non-platonic relationship with them. I wonder if that made anyone uncomfortable to see two females holding hands and realize now that it might have. And that I don’t really care.

The other thing that has been dancing in my mind from my research is not even related to the LGBT community. One of the books I had was evaluating the statistics of different relationships within households, as reported by the census. It was marking trends in unmarried-partner relationships, both for same-sex, and different-sex partners, and of interracial marriages. And it occurs to me now, after eight or nine years of marriage, that my brother and his wife would be considered an inter-racial couple. My brother is Caucasian, my sister-in-law is Indian. Before doing my research for this class, it didn’t matter(4), so much to the point that I didn’t see them as an interracial couple, I just saw my brother and sister-in-law(5). But now I wonder if maybe they cause “looks” when they go out in public—although according to the literature, most interracial couples that are not a Caucasian-Black mix have more acceptance than that particular pairing. This reflects a certain level of discomfort in our society.

Hopefully over time these perceptions can change. Hopefully the fears that are tied to differences between people and the discomfort of seeing two different people as a couple will diminish.

I have hope for future generations. As this generation struggles to get equal rights for all sub-communities in the nation, and as we make baby steps forward(6), it will bring the issues to light, and parents and teachers will be forced to speak with their children about them. Some will instill the fear they feel, wrapped in religious beliefs or convictions, or in simple prejudice. Some, like my sister-in-law will tell their children that it’s okay, casually thrown into a conversation. In a discussion about how important school is to her six-year-old daughter, and trying to pre-empt peer pressure on the dating scene, my sister-in-law told Tessa that she must remember the proper order of things: “Finish school, get a job, get a house, and then you can have boyfriends or girlfriends.”

I can only hope the youth of our country grows up with such tolerance as is being instilled in this family, and that when they see a couple they won’t focus on those differences, they’ll just see two people in love.

Footnotes

1. Big thanks to Tamara Cohen, Linda Lamme, Charles Brown and Terry Fleming for their help.
2. There is even an activity day in Gainesville/ at UF—same-sex hand holding day—in support of LGBT community.
3. Whom some may consider doesn’t count, as we look so much alike that most people can tell we’re siblings.
4. Not that it matters to me now.
5. And still do.
6. For instance, the whole debate sparked by gay-marriages.